Monday, February 16, 2009

bad example

Why do we even call it "Monday" anymore?
Why not call it "Cliche-day" and be done with it.

Ex: I hate my new haircut.

Dude. I just typo-ed "hairbut" and why did I change it?
It really is a hairbutt. With all the grossness implied.


Ex: I emailed my little sis to get her new (since last summer) address.

She calls me back to enlist my help trying to get my nephew to stop being disrespectful and talking back. (He turned 13 this weekend.) I said I would talk to him, but also encouraged her to 1) Call that Boys Town hotline and see if they had any parenting tips/advice/behavior to nip this mouthy thing in the bud, and 2) encourage her to make amends with our father so we can all provide a united/family front on the issue of being respectful.

Yeah. I'm not sure which pissed her off more, but I am, once again, the idiot sister who has no children, so why did she even call me as I obviously am not coming to the table with solutions.


Ex: Leaving early to have car appraised.

Have to haul over to Elmhurst to have my insurance company tell me that they aren't giving me any money towards fixing my junker of a car...even though the other driver's at fault. Because we are BOTH ON THE SAME INSURANCE. So, they don't want to pay either of us.

I know I drive a 12-year old beater...but he HIT my CAR. I don't expect it to be fixed to a pristine glow...but I'm going to waste the rest of my afternoon with them telling me that I'm going to have to come up with my deductible to have it fixed. My stomach is already churning.

Speaking of which...


Ex: To get back on a healthy eating routine, I started eating cereal in the mornings.

Unfortunately, instead of the regular shredded wheat, I forgot that I picked up the Shredded Wheat n' Bran. I've been eating it for a few days now and, man, today was the day when the "Bran" decided to step up to the plate.

Two words: Colon Blow.
My insides must be as clean and pink as a newborn's.



In other news...I'm not proud to admit to being a reality tv junkie. But, it's true. The Amazing Race, America's Next Top Mode (next month!), Project Runway, Survivor, the occasionally Dancing With the Stars and assorted others.

But the only one I ever really write or communicate with others about is American Idol.

For the past few years, I've been part of an email list...this year, we kicked it up to a blog (where I'm pretty sure I'll be the main contributing writer.)

If you follow AI, enjoy some snark and would like to unburden yourself amongst your peers, check us out at idol words.

Oof. Time to take the car in....wish me luck.

3 comments:

Mr. Snrub said...

"help trying to get my nephew to stop being disrespectful and talking back."

What else is Mee-maw for? :)

I never laugh out loud at blogs, but, the "Bran stepped up to the plate" line got me...

well done.

rebar said...

>>What else is Mee-maw for? :)

SanDER!!!!

Wow. There really is no way to effective yell at someone online to any comic effect.

Anyway, as you well know, you are LUCKY you are far from my reach, as I'm sure you imagine the can of whoop ass I just opened.

It also has your name on it, in case I'm being too subtle.


...and then, your laughter at my Bran bit quells my rage.

All are safe...for now.
Until the bear is poked again.

Mr. Snrub said...

Thank you for your mercy.