The City of Big Shoulders.
Former Hog Butcher to the World.
And on days like today...we are the Stinky Onion.
Some wise ass updated the Wikipedia page for Chicago.
Stating, in bold:
Chicago (pronounced shi-KAH-goh or shi-KAW-goh) is the largest and most corrupt city in the United States city by population in the state of Illinois and the American Midwest of the United States.
Har-dee-har, asshole. That said. Turns out it's pretty spot-on. Every time we look to be moving past the "political machine" that this city was built on, a new beetle crawls out from under the rock.
Our current governor, Rod Blagojevich (D) has completely outdone our former governor George Ryan (R) - who is currently serving time for corruption, mind you - by the breadth of his illegal "pay for play" machinations.
Hell, they gave him his own page on Huffington Post!
Which goes to show you, greed is not about party affiliation. It's just about you being an arrogant bastard who thinks he can pull one over on an entire state and get paid while doing it.
I'm thrilled he got arrested. Our state needs an governmental enema. Now, if my secret boyfriend US Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald, who arrested Blago at the crack of dawn Tuesday AM, (and who also convicted Ryan) would do me a favor and turn his laser focus on our Olympic-obsessed Mayor Richard Daley (D) and our County Board President Todd Stroger (D)?
If we could cut the corrupt heads off our hydra in a domino-like fashion, the underlings might take notice that the times, they are a'changin.
These arrests come too few and far between. But, if they [bleeping] started to start slicing and dicing the big guns, I think that this [bleeping] city (and [bleeping] state) might have a chance to clean out it's [bleeping] gutters.
And while our Congress never had the balls to impeach Bush, I'm hoping that Illinois can show them how to show a corrupt official the [bleeping] door.
And God Bless Stephen Colbert and his writing staff. If you haven't seen their response to Blago, it's a must. (And it has one of the best interviews of Charlie Kaufman I've seen.) Rock on.
Update:
Hey! Turns out that today is Blago's 52nd birthday!
Don't forget to wish that mother[bleeper] a happy [bleeping] birthday!!
Quote of the day: (Atlantic Monthly) "Incredible. Blagojevich was already under investigation. And then he tries to sell Obama's Senate seat? I don't think I've ever seen anything like this. This dude tried to auction the Senate seat of the President-Elect of the United States. Wow. They haven't even invented a machine that can calculate the Fail Factor here. I do believe we have gone to Interstellar Fail. Intergalactic, perhaps."
FACT: You can see his arrogance from space.
3 comments:
I may have the opportunity to sell out my acting chops at my job, but your state....man, your state is all effed up! I miss Chicago.
-jen's buddy kate
ps...i bookmarked you like 3 weeks ago, way to one up me with a comment!! :)
>>man, your state is all effed up!
(sighs)
Yeah.
As sick as I am about it, in a way, it actually makes me feel better about the many dysfunctions in my world.
I mean, at least nobody's wiretapping me.
That I'm aware of.
An old MS friend of mine was dating a politician who was in the middle of a big scandal and they wiretapped her phone. It was a lot of clicking. So we either avoiding using the phone, or used it to leave a lot of cryptic messages to each other. It was fun.
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